Relying on My P-ness

(Yes, you might not want to read the title of this post out loud!)

This summer has been wildly busy... one daughter graduating and transitioning into her post-grad life in DC, one daughter graduating and transitioning to college, son needing extra TLC with some life-management issues, work changes for husband, new companion animal and new medical needs of the current companion animal, higher than normal consulting client volume, learning Sakai for work, planning and preparing for my fall class, finishing up my Business Etiquette and Protocol certification, maintaining a work-out routine, re-doing two rooms in the house and everything else that comes with a farm, home and family of five. So there were definitely times my To-Do list seemed like a Not-Getting-Done List. I realized it was a good time to take stock and figure out how I could use my strengths to keep it all together (because my usual fall-back of working longer and harder wasn't cutting it).

I quickly figured out that my usual strengths (Strategic- I am able to sort through the clutter to find the best ways to proceed; Maximizer – Excellence, not average is my measure; Activator – I am impatient for action, When can I get started?; Ideation – I am always looking for connection with ideas) were probably not helping to reduce my long, long lists of "musts and shoulds". I was only setting increasingly higher standards for myself, generating even more ideas for completion and multiplying my impatience that massive accomplishments weren't piling up at the end of each day. So I retreated to my newly re-created retreat space (known to others as my sun porch), along with my Enya playlist and a wee glass of red wine, to strategize.

And I realized that sitting down and forcing myself to contemplate an alternate process was unique for me. My normal speed is wide open.... I don't think I have ever even sat down in my sun porch before. In fact, it is very rare to see me sitting down anywhere in my house except when I am working on my computer.

And it felt weird... I started out very twitchy - sure that I needed to be doing something, that I was getting further and further behind. But in reviewing the monster To-Do List, I realized I needed to do less methodical rote planning and more relying on my P-ness. Ah, that good old MBTI personality trait (Perceiving) that helped me get though college, grad school, work, balancing multiple jobs, children and life roles. People who have this preference are flexible and adaptable, preferring to work in bursts of energy and are actually stimulated by approaching deadlines. We have a strong sense of the "right" time to work on something and use that "now is the time" mentality to become a super-producer, although it might be just before the deadline.

I realized that everything on my To-Do lists would get done - but maybe not in the exact way and at the exact time and in the exact manner that an outsider (or my observing critical self) might engineer. Some items just weren't timely enough to get done yet. Face it, I am not going to shop for my daughter's college needs two months in advance (as lovely an idea as that might be)... but she and all her requirements were in the car when we headed out to Wilmington. Learning Sakai a month before I needed it might seem like a worthy goal, but it only meant I would forget more by the time I actually needed to use it. And actually working ahead on some things meant more last-minute re-dos as I adapted to others' needs and schedules.

So, I re-evaluated, re-prioritized and re-configured deadlines, ultimately relying on knowing that it would indeed all get done, all in good time. And while my To-Do list might not have been shorter, it felt less overwhelming and less capable of overpowering everything else in my life. So summer ended up being a little more relaxing, with a little more time spent enjoying family and a little more peace and reflection. And the other stuff all got done....

What changes have you made lately that have improved your quality of life?

Things Your Boss Will Never Say to You (Hints for new graduates!)

Things Your Boss Will Never Say to You…

“It is fine that you forgot to turn in that critical client proposal. You can just turn it in later.”
“I understand that you want to go out of town on Friday and miss the client meeting. I will fill you in on what was discussed next week.”
“You are not sure where to find all of the information you need to complete your report? Just email me tonight and I will send you all of the links and documents.”
“You overslept and missed the staff meeting? Not a problem, it wasn’t so important anyway.”
“So you lost the company cell phone last night at a club? Just touch base with IT to get another one.”
“You’ve been receiving my emails about the change in the proposal deadline, but you didn’t get a chance to read them yet? Well, let me know when you get around to them.”
“You missed the client meeting because you forgot to write it on your calendar? Well, just make sure you are at the next one!”
“You don’t need to write this down because I will be sending you reminders on it anyway.”
“I am certain that you will be getting a raise and promotion after six months because you have been doing your job.”

What Your Boss Might Say to You…

“What do you mean you don’t know how to adhere to deadlines without reminders, manage company property, maintain a calendar, work your assigned hours (and more), find materials or information on your own, motivate yourself to excel regardless of raises or promotions, use initiative to meet and exceed company expectations, or anticipate needs without explicit instructions?”

Or he/she might just say “You’re fired!”